Am going back to work

Hey dear,

Just a normal day at home. You are clad in your usual T-shirt & shorts. The feeding bottle is a constant reminder that you are still only a baby. You have graduated to much grown-up things like straw cup, which are seen in the back-ground.

You are sure growing up fast. Am gonna miss quite a few of these moments when at work. Am going back to work from this week. What have I gotten myself into?

Love u sweets.

For the past 3 weeks, I have sneaked out of home for a couple of hours so that you know to hold your own. Amma is gonna be away from morning till evening from this week on, and I don't know how you will manage. During the first week, when I had to be away, everything would remind me of you. I would open my handbag, and there wud be something of yours. I went shopping, and I found pins lying on the floor, and that got me thinking of you and your hair-pin story. I hated long rides, coz I had nothing to do, and all I did was think about you. I even had my moments when tears would well up just thinking that you weren't there with me.

The second week outings were much better than the first. I got over the missing-my-baby thing a bit. I looked around and I found Singapore quite beautiful. Different people, places, things.... I never noticed these before, coz I had time for none other than you. But all the same, whenever there is a baby around, it got me thinking of you, and I longed to get back home and see you run towards me with your bright smile and lovely eyes with your arms open wide.

The third week outings... I didn't do much. I felt like I wanted to be with you more, play with you more. Now time is up, and amma has to get back to work. I sometimes, feel quite selfish to leave you and go to work. Later in my life, I wouldn't be happy if I had not done what I am going to. I would regret having stayed at home. I would regret for not even having made an effort to get back to work.

Am just afraid that, if I don't, I would just not have dreams of my own. All that I would dream about, is you and would probably want YOU to do what I dreamed to. Quite complicated. Fear not, if this doesn't work out for you, I would quit right away and be with ya, the rest of my life.

Love you loads and loads. You will always be my first love forever. Anything for ya.

Just a few extra kilos

I don't know where it all started. But there are quite a few false beliefs about pregnancy. Ok fellas, U might wanna stop here if you are feeling queasy. Seriously, am just gonna talk about weight-gain and nothing else, I solemnly swear so!

I was always of the thought that u get fat after ur first baby. Well, there weren't many in my friends gang, who had babies before me. Just a couple of them. Sumu... and she started to look like Sumo! Mathu... don't think she gained much. G3.... hmm, she did. Ann... yes, a bit. but I must assure you tgat they are all on the right track and losing it all day by day.

Me, I weighed a good 56 Kgs before my preganacy and weighed 68 Kgs just before delivery and weighed 64 the next day. Considering that Nephy weighed only 2.75, the rest must be all the water that the baby was floating in.

U wud be shocked to know how much I weigh now... about 51-52. Am sure, I would fit into a trousers that I wore when in my college days. Running around your baby, sure helps. Especially, your inner conscience starts talking bloody too much after the baby's arrival.

Everytime, am late on sterilising her things, my conscience talks crazy, keeps telling me that am knowingly, in full conscience, letting germs & wat-not into my baby's mouth. When am late about mopping with good-old-dettol, the big-mouth conscience starts screaming that Nephy is playing on something unclean. When am late on getting her breakfast done, it goes on and on about how she must be starving. When am late on changing her just-a-lil-wet clothes, there it goes again about how Nephy might catch a cold. When I take my eyes off her for just minute, it keeps reminding me of what horrible things she might find and put into her mouth.. so complaining...ddddduuuuuuuhhhhhh!

So, am on my feet all the time, doing the best I can. And the truth is, it has actually helped me lose all my extra kilos. Therz still a bit to go though. But unfortunately, I have been blessed.

Guess what, I have been gifted with people. Now, therz Nephy's grand parents and they keep running behind her. Therz a housekeeper, who deals with the rest. Life is just amazing when you don't have to budge so much, other than just to play with ur baby. About the extra kilos, I think am gonna put on more, and am just plain happy about it!

The happy and The Grrr

Babies are of two kinds, am gonna call it the happy and the Grrrr

Happy ones are those ones that break into a giggle easily. Easy to get them to break into smiles, just a wave of your hand, a funny face or just about anything. Natalie, my brother's kid, happens to be of this kind. She wud break into smiles at anyone, and wud want to be lifted by everybody. Such sweets!

Grrr ones are those babies which give u the "have u completely lost it?" look, when u try to get them to laugh. Serious ones. Nephy happens to be a Grrr baby. Lotsa ppl try to get her attention and to smile, but all that the lil miss would do is point her little finger and say,'Toe'! (Wonder what she says)

Recently, on our way back home, in the lift, there was this old lady, looking tired and ready to hit the bed, returning home after a hard day's work, I believe. With absolutely no prompting, Nephy cooed out to her then smiled (try saying 'E', tats how she smiles), then did her almost-perfect winky-wink and finished it off with a flying kiss. The lady laughed out loud and I think Nephy just made her day!

Don't you dare....

Don't you dare close the refrigerator..... So fascinated with it, that I absolutely hate it when its closed

Don't you dare put a blanket on me.... (This habit, since she was 10 days old. For the first ten days, that lil doll did nothing, but eat-pee-poop- sleep. The very first thing she did, was to kick off her blankets.Still continues... Sometimes, I would find her sleeping peacefully, and cover her up with a light blanket, the next moment, she would wake up, toss and turn and kick around until she gets that damn blanket off. In the process, she would wake up and cry. Soooo much, for lovingly covering up my baby to sleep cosy....)

Don't you dare serve rice on my plate.... (completely hates it..... podi... nee periya vellai-kaari...)

Don't you dare show me your jewel box.... unless you want everything strewn around in odd corners

Don't you dare gimme a bath without a raincoat....

Don't you dare leave the laptop open...unless you want all the keys sent up to heaven

Don't you dare vacuum, i hate the noise and that green alien...

Don't you dare mop the floor, unless you carry me...

Don't you dare play anything on the TV other than 'Yeppadiyo maati kittein...' song (How apt)

Don't you dare take me near the waffle shop...

Don't you dare change my clothes... I know how to pull off my diapers, my pull-ups...

Don't you dare ask me to come home from the playground...

Don't you dare talk on your mobile phone before I have a good talk with the caller

Don't you dare leave any pens around, unless you want me to scribble on ur sofa

Don't you dare read any books, the only books you will read are mine... and with me...

Don't you dare sit on my lil chair

Don't you dare do the dishes... I hate it the most...

Don't you dare cook without carrying me... I need to supervise...

Don't you dare dress up, I will not get down from ya, what if you leave me and go....

Don't you dare talk to your mom for long, someone might want to talk to me...

Don't you dare pick up my toys and put them away, i like them all around the house wherever I go...

Don't you dare take your eyes off me, I WILL be doing something that I shouldn't be....

Don't you dare water the plants without me... They only grow, when I water them...

Don't you dare ever ever brush my teeth... until, you want the neighbours to call in the police...

Don't you dare ..... don't you dare.... don't you dare..... Life is quite tough to be a mom, too many dark-dares lurking around!

Tantrums continue....

Tantrums continue....

Its been a week since she started on this great mission... tantrums... and I already feel like I've aged considerably in this week alone.

As usual, the crying, the screaming, stomping the ground with her tiny lil feet(looks more like dancing), and the hands on her head... God, oh, God...

My mom says it might get worser... rolling on the ground, clinging on to mama's feet.... Yeah, I remeber my lil cousins doing it... It was so much fun to watch it...

She want to play with my mobile.... Anto's mobile... my bag, his wallet, all my kitchen utensils, her favourite happens to be my puttu-naali... oh C'mon, wats so intersting about that?

And ofcourse, my laptop... the other night, she pulled out a good number of keys in seconds

(I wonder if there is ever a record of 'pulling out keys the fastest', am sure Nephy wud win without even breaking into a sweat. Took me a good long long while to put them all back ....grrr....)

Hmm... What should I expect next? Somebody help.....

Nephy's tantrums

Thats her latest and newest...

She throws up tantrums left right and center.. and I just don't know how to handle it.

She cries and screams and sometimes, she would put her hands to her head and bend down and cry and cry, until she gets what she wants. QUite funny to watch if you aren't Nephy's mom or dad. But quite embarassing if you are either one of the two.

I just am not aware of how to handle this rather dangerous trick. I keep giving in. Am fighting a losing war. The opponent has a very strong weapon by her side... scream as much as you can, and it works too.

I think God should probably publish a handbook saying what to expect and how to get through it, whenever, he throws a chanllenge at you. Then, life would be much easier and lovely.

Stop it sweetheart! Stop it at the earliest! Amma is too weak-hearted to say 'NO' to you... Appa sounds all strong on the outside, keeps saying, its a good time to buy a cane, but he is just too mellow on the inside! I know you would understand and grow out of it.

This one is not about Nephy!

Well, quite a few have asked me why am not writing anymore... Oh, am so pushed to the end of being extremely elated. Well, do u really really really like my blogs.... I still can't believe that some people actaully do. Thanks u fellas. U rock my world!

To tell you the truth, I just don't have the time to write anymore. Some-person at home(considering there are only two, Anto & Nephy, U would guess it right, even if you have an IQ of 10 :) ), that-some-person just dooesn't understand how important my writing is to me.

I usually write after 10 o'clock, after Nephy is asleep. I love the peace and the quiet and her lovely face when she sleeps. True inspiration to write! So, it was... until that some-person changed his night time supper timings. He simply refuses to have it early, so that I could finish off my chores and get to my writing. The blame falls squarely on that some-person. So, now I finish off with my chores at abt 10:30/11 and after that I go to bed straight. So, in all my fake anger I said 'You are supressing the writer in me....'

WRITER.... that some-person immediately, without missing a beat, suggested that I apply to the Indian Police Force for the job of 'Writer'. hmm... Shud I laugh or cry.... Ennakku theriyalaiye... enakku theriyalaiye....